NEWLYWED & FRUSTRATED!

By on December 15, 2012
Man Consoling Girlfriend

Couple-nigeria infonollywoodChances are that you are a newlywed or know someone who is. Most say it’s the time period during the first two years of marriage when the couple can’t get their hands off each other. When the use of pet names like “baby”, “darling”, “honey”, etc are used in overload. When the passion couldn’t be hotter and the love flames couldn’t be more on fire. But if you think this phase is all honey-moon 24/7, then that is simply a fantasy. Maybe you’ve read far too many romance novels. It’s been said that if you could make it through any conflict during the first couple of years, you can handle anything in the years to come if you both commit to it.

There are however, some personality traits that could spring up after marriage that may cause one to seriously reevaluate the decision they made to tie the knot. I recently came across an article of a woman who has been married for a couple of years to a good looking Christian husband who epitomizes the word “swagger”! He has high moral standards such that he doesn’t drink, smoke or womanize. The one thing this woman complains about is that he has a temper, an anger problem. They fight about every little thing. The constant bickering has caused the woman to grow cold about the marriage. It’s zapped away the loving feeling and she is considering leaving him.  Granted, that could a little extreme, but it happens.

One thing is sure – effective communication will do wonders for any relationship. The key word is “effective”. You have not communicated if you have not been heard and understood. Such communication cannot hold during a heated exchange. You must cool off first. Gather your thoughts and present the issues, attack the issues but not your spouse. Consider having a trusted mediator only if absolutely necessary.  Is this situation repairable? Can they rekindle that fire? Please share your thoughts.

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